Restlessness at Commencement

J4816 2016 Spring Commencement Yager Stadium
2016 Spring Commencement Yager Stadium- Photo Credit: Ricardo Trevino Jr. Photography

Saturday May 14th 2016 I, along with my cohort, graduated from Miami University. It was a cold and blustery day on that Saturday afternoon. The chill was more akin to early November, not mid-May. Yet, we sat through the ceremony eagerly awaiting our opportunity to walk across the stage, shake the President’s hand and know that we completed two years of hard work and are no longer Masters Candidates; we are Masters.

As I sat through the University Commencement, I saw myself reflecting on my time at Miami University. It was a strange feeling, knowing that I was done studying (for now) and would no longer be taking courses; I would be working a full time job in just a few short months. That excitement (and anxiousness) was palpable among my peers. Yet, I also felt drastically different than when I graduated from Michigan State University with my Bachelor of Arts.

Two years ago when I walked across the stage in the Wharton Center for Performing Arts, I was filled with immense pride, joy, and nostalgia. I had completed something that no one in my family before me had; I was the first to attend, graduate, and complete my studies at an institution of higher learning. I knew I was going to attend graduate school by my commencement ceremony at Michigan State, and I knew I would be leaving behind friends that became family. It was a bittersweet moment to be sure.

Two days ago, when I walked across the stage at Yager Stadium, I was filled with restlessness and pride. The feelings were strikingly different than when I walked a similar path two years prior. My time at Miami University was a good one; I developed friendships that are akin to a family unit, I learned a great deal, (both personally and professionally), and once again accomplished something that no one in my family prior to me had done: attended, graduate, and complete my studies in graduate school. Once again, I knew where my life would take me in my next chapter. But the feeling of nostalgia and joy was missing from this commencement ceremony.

Graduate school is vastly different than undergraduate studies. I made strong friendships and continued to grow, but that feeling of restlessness and eagerness to move on was something that I had not yet felt. Maybe this feeling of restlessness is a product of being in school for 18 years straight, but somehow I think that is too simple an explanation. Instead, I think the restlessness is a result of knowing that I am ready for the next chapter.

When I left Michigan State, I was unsure if I was ready to be a graduate student. I was not entirely confident in my ability to be successful. Now, after completing two years of a rigorous Masters program, I know I am able to be successful in a full time position. I know that it will be challenging, but I know that I can persevere through those challenges.

Restlessness is not a normal feeling at University Commencements, but it’s a feeling I’m glad I felt two days ago.

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